Tuesday, May 09, 2006

Hypocrisy

"The greatest way to live with honor in this world is to be what we pretend to be." -- Socrates


As you know, I like writing about hypocrisy. And today I'm going to write about one of the biggest hypocrites I know ... ME. Mine is the worst kind because I actually have some control over it. Casting aspersions on others and ignoring my own shortcomings would be no way to live. Here goes:

I tout the advantages of communal living and criticize urban sprawl yet live in what many would consider the suburbs. It's especially tough when you have a kid. You are trying to balance everything ... cost, schools, access to employment, etc. But they are all just excuses. I truly believe in the merits of higher density city living. At some point in my life, I'd like for us to to move nearer the city center of a major city.

I like to think my wife and I are environmentalists yet we hold jobs that involve each of us driving 70+ miles a day. If I could figure out some way of getting to all my clients in a timely manner riding the bus, I'd do it. But with the large area of the valley, it is impossible logistically and time-wise. Solution ... I need to get a different job. Someone needs to pay me gobs of money to stay home and write. I can dream, can't I? We have little 4 cylinder cars. But we could do better. I'd love for us to both have hybrids. We're working towards getting me one within the next year.

I espouse the merits of patronizing local businesses but I still go to places like Target and Costco. Again, this is where a lively urban center would be an advantage. You would have many businesses of all types ... locally owned ... within walking distance. Money would be staying in your community. There would be less pollution because of less driving. When it comes to the big box stores, I do try to pick the lesser of two evils. See my earlier post on Costco. If faced with several undesirable choices, at least know what is going on with your money. This is a good site for checking on businesses: BuyBlue.org

I completely understand why it is good both personally and globally to consume organic foods, yet I don't take advantage of the numerous resources (whole food markets, farmers' markets, etc.) as often as I should. There are starting to be quite a few inexpensive supermarkets that offer organic foods: No real excuse for me to not to use them other than being a lazy sod.

We try to be charitable and volunteer when we can, but I don't think we do enough. We give quite a bit, but you can always give more. We've volunteered for voter registration drives, at the food bank and at Michelle's church, but there are many more opportunities to help. Again, this is a case where you try to balance raising a child, running a business and being a good citizen. If I wasn't so chicken-shit, I'd just sell our house, liquidate all of our 401K's and IRA's and go join the Peace Corps or do some kind of huminatarian work in another country. And I think it would be a unique life experience for us all. It would certainly provide a different perspective to Alex that Michelle and I did not get exposed to growing up in small town Iowa. There are times where I really, really think that's what I should do. Most of the rest of the time I think maybe I can do more good by continuing to work as hard as I can for the next 15 years or so, retire and then volunteer extensively for the rest of our lives.

So what does it all mean? It means none of us are perfect. As long as we are trying to do good and trying to do better, there is hope for us. Never be content that what you are doing is enough.

"The unexamined life is not worth living." -- Socrates

12 comments:

Laura said...

There's always something more we can do to be the person we wish we could be. Reality steps in and bites you in the ass. You're different than many of the hypocrites you criticize because you actually examine your beliefs and know that if you could do these things, you would - rather than not giving a flying fuck about others. I wouldn't feel so bad if I were you.

dbackdad said...

I know some of them I don't have a huge control over. But others, like where I shop and what I shop for, are completely within my control. And I really need to do a better job with those.

Sadie Lou said...

A humble post. Thank you for being so honest and inspiring honesty within your reader's circle.

I espouse the merits of patronizing local businesses but I still go to places like Target and Costco.

Oh man. Me too. *raises a guilty hand*
I absolutely will not step foot in a Wal*Mart or a Blockbuster. I just will not do it. However, Target and Costco are two of my favortie stores.
I love Trader Joe's too.
Unfortunately, I have to drive an hour to got to all three of those stores because I live in a quaint, little town that fights urban sprawl.
Hooray!
We are selling our gas guzzling SUV this summer. I'm proud of this. I want to buy a Subaru.
Anyhoo,
Thanks for this post.

dbackdad said...

Thanks Sadie. I feel like a slacker but you make me feel a little better. The first step is admitting you have a problem. He-he

Good for your town. There have been several communities (including Portland, OR) that have done a pretty good job with limiting urban sprawl.

Laura said...

Oh sure, there's always more we can do. But some things are theoretically, but not realistically possible. I know lots of people who want to buy more organic food, technically they could afford it, but not without sacrificing something else more important.

I've noticed a correlation in Chicago with the concentration of yuppies and trixies and the number of corporate owned businesses. It's sad really... I think it's because those people came from the suburbs and want the convenience of the city with the cultural black-hole of the suburbs. Why go to the locally owned Mexican restaurant when you could go to Chili's??? Sigh

Sadie Lou said...

Why go to the locally owned Mexican restaurant when you could go to Chili's??? Sigh

People will sacrifice quality for quicker, won't they? It's terrible. My grandparents owned a Mexican restaurant for 27 years before they retired. During that time, we saw the comings and goings of all kinds of "traditional Mexican food". The only one that stuck around was Taco Bell. When my grandparents retired, a Jimboy's opened up as well. Now all you can get around here is a crappy, deep fried wanna-be Taco.
It's sick.
I feel sad for the ma and pa restaurant oners because they don't get the deals on produce and supplies that the chain restaurants get. The little guys have to charge more to make a small profit but still be competitive with the big guys.
I hate that.

Isabella di Pesto said...

You're too hard on yourself, dbackdad.

That fact that you're even aware of and care about all that you've posted on puts you head and shoulders above the average American.

I still admire you.

dbackdad said...

Thanks guys.

I'm not trying to hold a pity party or be too self-depracating. I just honestly feel that these are some things that I could improve on (and a few thousand more). :-)

Sadie Lou said...

self examination is a good thing.
I totally get why you did this post.

dbackdad said...

Concerning the organic food, there is an even harder core segment called "local food systems". I read about them in the latest Mother Jones:

No Bar Code

They view even the whole foods supermarket segment as being too corporate and one step this side of being Wal-Mart. It's an interesting article.

Just what I need ... another complication in my drive to be better. Screw it ... I'm going to McDonald's and having a hormone-enriched hamburger and a Coca-Cola. He-he.

greatwhitebear said...

Trader Joe's? Sprouts? YOu guys must live in an exotic world! LOL.

Here in hoosierville, we have so few choices. I absolutely will not shop at wally world, and do buy al my groceries at the locally owned chain. Unfortunately, my reason for that is not so noble. It is convenient, and the chain has employed all of my children at one time or another and currently employs my daughter.

And I could do so much more too! I could be much more conscious of the detergents and cleaning products I use.

I could remember to shut the damn computer down at night.

I could quit making little trips here and there because I am not organized enough to plan my trips better. Although, I must say, $3 gas is forcing me to do better there.

Bottom line, there is plenty of hypocrasy to go around. But as usual, you are right, self awareness it the first step.

Sadie Lou said...

I could remember to shut the damn computer down at night.


Ha!
Totally.