Saturday, October 29, 2005

Gonorrhea Lectim

The Center for Disease Control has issued a warning about a new virulent strain of sexually transmitted disease. This disease is contracted through dangerous and high risk behavior.

The disease is called Gonorrhea Lectim (pronounced "gonna re-elect him").

Many victims contracted it in 2004, after having been screwed for the past 4 years, in spite of having taken measures to protect themselves from this especially troublesome disease. Cognitive sequelae of individuals infected with Gonorrhea Lectim include, but are not limited to:
. anti-social personality disorder traits;
. delusions of grandeur with a distinct messianic flavor;
. chronic mangling of the English language;
. extreme cognitive dissonance;
. inability to incorporate new information;
. pronounced xenophobia;
. inability to accept responsibility for actions;
. exceptional cowardice masked by acts of misplaced bravado;
. uncontrolled facial smirking;
. ignorance of geography and history;
. tendencies toward creating evangelical theocracies; and
. a strong propensity for categorical, all-or-nothing behavior.

The disease is sweeping Washington. Naturalists and epidemiologists are amazed and baffled that this malignant disease, which originated only a few years ago from a Bush in Texas.


*** Ed. note -- didn't mean to cheapen the discussion with a joke. But I couldn't resist (dbackdad) ***

5 comments:

CyberKitten said...

That was laugh out loud funny. Thanks for lightening the mood there....

greatwhitebear said...

I agree with CK... Best laugh I've had in a while that wasn't at the expense of a Cubs fan!

dbackdad said...

I wish I could claim authorship but a friend forwarded this one to me. Very clever and very funny.

JCMasterpiece said...

very amusing

Anonymous said...

Damn gonorrhea.. that thing ruined my plans of Order Viagra Online now I'm the most sad man over the world.